Post by INFINITE PRO. on Aug 31, 2022 1:23:09 GMT
"Hahahahaha"
Maniacal laughter rings out, causing the camera to search for the abrasive sound’s source. The image shakes through the hall of a quaint hotel corridor, before resting on El Rey. Coming up a flight of stairs, the XHF’s youngest X*Crown champion is grinning from ear to ear like a Cheshire Cat.
Rey: It’s hilarious. Not that I lost, that will never be funny to me, but that I got Spike Kane. Yeah, yeah, he won, but I out extremed the God of Xtreme when I broke out of that pin by stabbing that motherfucker. Hahaha.
El Rey takes a deep breath to stop himself from laughing, but the smile does not fade.
Rey: Now I move on. I move on to the title picture and one half of the Jam Rockers, Alastor Touchdown.
El Rey rubs his hands in front of his face salivating at the thought of getting a shot at the title.
Rey: Before I can take that title off of him, though, I have to go through him and his buddy Jimmi. Luckily I have back up. The kind of back up someone like Spike Kane could only dream of. And thanks to what I did to Spike Kane it won’t be in the opener, it will be in the main event.
Arriving at room 305, El Rey waves his hand across the frame like he’s presenting the marquee. Zoran Sainovic exits through, joining his protégé in the hallway.
Zoran: Technically.
Rey: Yeah, technically! Wait, what?
Zoran: Technically you got zere, but really you're my plus one.
Letting that cold hard truth dull the smile on El Rey’s face, Zoran leaves the scene, heading down the stairs.
Rey: So then after the Royal Crown...
Zoran (speaking as he exits): You don't win ze strap and it will be back to jerking curtains. So its very important for you get ze cover on Touchdown in zis tag, to improve your momentum going into zat five-way. Besides, if zis goes south - we all know who'll be eating ze pin.
With that the monster disappears from view. El Rey rolls his eyes. Waiting a beat for the front door to close in the distance, before assessing this advice for the camera.
Rey: Senior moments. We all know that I not only got to the main event on my own, but I brought tag wrestling with me.
Accidentally believing his own lies; El Rey builds his confidence to the point where he wants to get a last word in. Running to the end of the hall, Rey opens a window, hoping on camera it will make it look like he stood up for himself. Said heroic posturing soon melts away, when Rey looks down into an alleyway to find Zoran starring back up from the abyss.
Rey: Uh, this isn’t my room – I’ll just be...
Zoran (shouting up at a third floor window): Based on our X*Crown victories, we're clearly ze better singles stars, but how do we fare in a tag setting?
Rey: Should we get matching tights?
Zoran: You want to get Tracy to sew you up a version of my suit?
Rey: No sir.
Zoran: So we need to build our tag fundamentals, starting with trust exercises.
Rey: I got you.
Zoran: No, I have you.
Rey: Come again?
Zoran: Jump, I'll catch you.
Rey: Hell no!
Zoran: Have a little faith...
Rey: You just want me to cripple myself so the tag turns into a singles match, probably for the gold.
Zoran (long pause): ...Ze zought never crossed my mind. Now jump!
Rey: NO!
Zoran: Don't make me come up there!
Rey: I don't wanna...
Zoran: Look Rey, we’re on ze same team. I don’t want to FORCE you to do anything you’re not comfortable with ...pal. But you’re going zrough zat window. I know it, you know, ze whole IPW nation knows it – and if I have to zrow you zrough it, I might not be able to come back down here to catch you in time. Perhaps zey called you up to ze main event too soon. Yeah, maybe I should be tagging with Spike instead...
This insult is enough to cut through El Rey’s defences, numbing his well-honed survival instincts. Eyes narrowed into hateful daggers, Rey barely has time to mutter “Fuck Spike” before he’s clamouring through the window frame. Even if he doesn’t count on Sainovic to catch him, El Rey can use the old man to break his fall! No different than hitting a missile dropkick!
Rey: Fuck Sp-
What he doesn’t count on is how quickly the geriatric monster gets out of the way.
Back upstairs inside of the hotel room, El Rey leans back on a couch with his leg elevated on the corner. Ice packs are being used to bring down swelling everywhere. The image returns just as a doctor finishes checking on the surly youth.
Zoran: I can’t help but feel zis is somehow my fault.
Rey: It’s ENTIRELY your fault!
Zoran: What’s ze verdict, doc? I can’t see how Rey could possibly compete-
Doctor: He’ll be fine.
Zoran: I’ll let Jason know we’d better turn ze tag into a singles match for ze strap-
Doctor: There is no reason why Rey here can’t wrestle.
Heading for the door, the doctor continues to assure The Final Boss. Left alone, El Rey fights through the pain to address the camera.
Rey: Jam Rockers, in a different time, different place, we could’ve been stablemates or dare I say it, friends. Unfortunately, we’re not in a different time or place. No, we’re here in Infinite and you have each other and I have a mentor that is more dangerous than a loaded gun on a school campus in America. Now if you hadn’t pulled the rug out from under Cross Recoba, maybe we could’ve avoided this, but you did... giving you possession of the one thing in this company I’m after. So now you’re in the line of fire. So what could have been is just that, what could have been.
El Rey pauses and shrugs his shoulders, losing an ice pack in the processes.
Rey: Now you have to deal with me in that ring as a rival. A rival that isn’t afraid to cut a bitch, just ask good ole Spike Kane.
El Rey smirks, but this moment of confidence is short lived, as Sainovic returns to the conversation.
Zoran: Zat is something we need to discuss.
Rey: Huh?
Zoran: Your stabbing technique. It was, what’s ze word, weak.
Rey: What do you mean? I drew blood. I broke the pin. I did everything I needed to do.
Zoran: Oh so you won ze match zen?
El Rey stares blankly at his mentor.
Zoran: Exactly.
From the couch, El Rey wants to grab an apple off the coffee table – but it’s just out of reach. According to some quack, El Rey is perfectly capable of sitting up to collect it, but the youth is hoping to milk his “superficial injuries” for all they’re worth. At least get out of a week of horrific trust exercises.
Clearly aware of Rey’s ploy and not amused, Sainovic stomps over and snatches up the fruit.
After a beat, Sainovic tosses the apple up in the air, El Rey instinctively moves, leaning forward on the couch to catch it. The moment the apple is in El Rey’s fist, Zoran stabs into it with a butterfly knife. El Rey is too shocked to even drop it.
Zoran: Faster in, overcompensating for resistance from whatever organ you’re cutting into. Be aware of how deep you’re going. At a certain point, each millimetre becomes a cost benefit analyzes, how much more damage are you doing, versus how much harder its going to be to get out. Keep it straight, and if you aren’t planning on a further flourish, zere is no reason not end with a twist.
El Rey stifles a yelp, as Sainovic removes the apple – the blade stopping just short of piercing right through into the youth's hand.
Zoran (twisting the knife in a way that splits the apple into slices, which he hands to his trembling ward): Now if zis was Cooldown’s kidney, we’d see just how tight zey were with Tuna.
Pale as a ghost, El Rey inspects his hand to make sure it’s still in one piece. Rey doesn’t really have an appetite, but Sainovic seems expectant, so he forces the apple down.
Zoran: Ze good news is, if you can shake off zat suicide attempt-
Rey: You told me to jump!
Zoran: ...Zen you are able to absorb impressive degrees of punishment. Zis plays to a certain tag team strength.
Rey: It does?
Zoran: Exactly, we’re going to school ze Jamrockers with a little RNR treatment.
Rey: I love it! What does that mean?
Zoran: Classic tag formula. You play Ricky Morton, letting Jam pass you around like you were a prison leisure centre, zen when zey’re starting to get tired pummelling you into hamburger, HOT TAG, I pull a Gibson, coming in with a few well placed blades for ze win.
Rey: Why do I have to be Morton? Why can’t you be Morton?
Zoran: Zat wouldn’t be very believable.
Rey: That’s not fair! I want a chance to be Mel Gibson too. I’ll fight you for it!
Sainovic forces a faint smile. It’s terrifying. The deep bruising makes it hard for El Rey to throw his hands over his mouth aghast at his suggestion. This is bad. He needs to think on his feet, but they’re resting on the couch!
Rey: ...............At Rock Paper Scissors.
Good save.
Zoran: Fine. If you really zink you can... Mel Gibson... who am I to dash your dream?
The two men bring their arms down three times, before the final reveal-
Zoran busts out scissors...
Which El Rey smashes with his rock.
Rey: So how does it work? You stumble into a tag, and I go on a drunken anti-Semitic rant?
Zoran: Best two out of zree.
Scissors are again smashed by rock.
Zoran: Zree out of five-
Rock just keeps breaking scissors; the humiliating montage finally ends with...
Zoran: It makes no sense... I could break a rock with scissors.
Rey: You could, but the rest of the world gets SMASHED.
Zoran: Zis game is silly. Perhaps we should switch to...
A dissolve takes us into the dead of night, where the hotel room is now trashed with a various board games. A coffee table between an increasingly cocky El Rey, and an unhinged looking Final Boss, hosts a chessboard. A student of the game, Sainovic is clearly going for a Najdorf Variation of the Sicilian Defence, when El Rey decides to use his knight to hop six pieces.
Rey: KING ME!
Zoran: Zat’s checkers.
Rey: Oh, I’ll just leave it there then.
Checkmate.
Zoran: ...How do you feel about Rummy?
Rey: Bring it on, Ricky!
And so the evening continues, with El Rey’s winning ways encouraging celebratory dances that might be counter productive to his health. It appears that the best-laid plans of the Final Boss have blown up in his face, and that humiliating defeat at the hands of the Jamrockers is inevitable. At least Jason Long will be happy. Still, when it comes to Zoran Sainovic, one has to wonder if this is part of a more sinister scheme. As El Rey busts out a deck of cards, the camera pans around the hotel room to the television set where Seventh Seal is playing. Here another fool plays games of chance against the Grim Reaper with life itself at stake...
Maniacal laughter rings out, causing the camera to search for the abrasive sound’s source. The image shakes through the hall of a quaint hotel corridor, before resting on El Rey. Coming up a flight of stairs, the XHF’s youngest X*Crown champion is grinning from ear to ear like a Cheshire Cat.
Rey: It’s hilarious. Not that I lost, that will never be funny to me, but that I got Spike Kane. Yeah, yeah, he won, but I out extremed the God of Xtreme when I broke out of that pin by stabbing that motherfucker. Hahaha.
El Rey takes a deep breath to stop himself from laughing, but the smile does not fade.
Rey: Now I move on. I move on to the title picture and one half of the Jam Rockers, Alastor Touchdown.
El Rey rubs his hands in front of his face salivating at the thought of getting a shot at the title.
Rey: Before I can take that title off of him, though, I have to go through him and his buddy Jimmi. Luckily I have back up. The kind of back up someone like Spike Kane could only dream of. And thanks to what I did to Spike Kane it won’t be in the opener, it will be in the main event.
Arriving at room 305, El Rey waves his hand across the frame like he’s presenting the marquee. Zoran Sainovic exits through, joining his protégé in the hallway.
Zoran: Technically.
Rey: Yeah, technically! Wait, what?
Zoran: Technically you got zere, but really you're my plus one.
Letting that cold hard truth dull the smile on El Rey’s face, Zoran leaves the scene, heading down the stairs.
Rey: So then after the Royal Crown...
Zoran (speaking as he exits): You don't win ze strap and it will be back to jerking curtains. So its very important for you get ze cover on Touchdown in zis tag, to improve your momentum going into zat five-way. Besides, if zis goes south - we all know who'll be eating ze pin.
With that the monster disappears from view. El Rey rolls his eyes. Waiting a beat for the front door to close in the distance, before assessing this advice for the camera.
Rey: Senior moments. We all know that I not only got to the main event on my own, but I brought tag wrestling with me.
Accidentally believing his own lies; El Rey builds his confidence to the point where he wants to get a last word in. Running to the end of the hall, Rey opens a window, hoping on camera it will make it look like he stood up for himself. Said heroic posturing soon melts away, when Rey looks down into an alleyway to find Zoran starring back up from the abyss.
Rey: Uh, this isn’t my room – I’ll just be...
Zoran (shouting up at a third floor window): Based on our X*Crown victories, we're clearly ze better singles stars, but how do we fare in a tag setting?
Rey: Should we get matching tights?
Zoran: You want to get Tracy to sew you up a version of my suit?
Rey: No sir.
Zoran: So we need to build our tag fundamentals, starting with trust exercises.
Rey: I got you.
Zoran: No, I have you.
Rey: Come again?
Zoran: Jump, I'll catch you.
Rey: Hell no!
Zoran: Have a little faith...
Rey: You just want me to cripple myself so the tag turns into a singles match, probably for the gold.
Zoran (long pause): ...Ze zought never crossed my mind. Now jump!
Rey: NO!
Zoran: Don't make me come up there!
Rey: I don't wanna...
Zoran: Look Rey, we’re on ze same team. I don’t want to FORCE you to do anything you’re not comfortable with ...pal. But you’re going zrough zat window. I know it, you know, ze whole IPW nation knows it – and if I have to zrow you zrough it, I might not be able to come back down here to catch you in time. Perhaps zey called you up to ze main event too soon. Yeah, maybe I should be tagging with Spike instead...
This insult is enough to cut through El Rey’s defences, numbing his well-honed survival instincts. Eyes narrowed into hateful daggers, Rey barely has time to mutter “Fuck Spike” before he’s clamouring through the window frame. Even if he doesn’t count on Sainovic to catch him, El Rey can use the old man to break his fall! No different than hitting a missile dropkick!
Rey: Fuck Sp-
What he doesn’t count on is how quickly the geriatric monster gets out of the way.
Back upstairs inside of the hotel room, El Rey leans back on a couch with his leg elevated on the corner. Ice packs are being used to bring down swelling everywhere. The image returns just as a doctor finishes checking on the surly youth.
Zoran: I can’t help but feel zis is somehow my fault.
Rey: It’s ENTIRELY your fault!
Zoran: What’s ze verdict, doc? I can’t see how Rey could possibly compete-
Doctor: He’ll be fine.
Zoran: I’ll let Jason know we’d better turn ze tag into a singles match for ze strap-
Doctor: There is no reason why Rey here can’t wrestle.
Heading for the door, the doctor continues to assure The Final Boss. Left alone, El Rey fights through the pain to address the camera.
Rey: Jam Rockers, in a different time, different place, we could’ve been stablemates or dare I say it, friends. Unfortunately, we’re not in a different time or place. No, we’re here in Infinite and you have each other and I have a mentor that is more dangerous than a loaded gun on a school campus in America. Now if you hadn’t pulled the rug out from under Cross Recoba, maybe we could’ve avoided this, but you did... giving you possession of the one thing in this company I’m after. So now you’re in the line of fire. So what could have been is just that, what could have been.
El Rey pauses and shrugs his shoulders, losing an ice pack in the processes.
Rey: Now you have to deal with me in that ring as a rival. A rival that isn’t afraid to cut a bitch, just ask good ole Spike Kane.
El Rey smirks, but this moment of confidence is short lived, as Sainovic returns to the conversation.
Zoran: Zat is something we need to discuss.
Rey: Huh?
Zoran: Your stabbing technique. It was, what’s ze word, weak.
Rey: What do you mean? I drew blood. I broke the pin. I did everything I needed to do.
Zoran: Oh so you won ze match zen?
El Rey stares blankly at his mentor.
Zoran: Exactly.
From the couch, El Rey wants to grab an apple off the coffee table – but it’s just out of reach. According to some quack, El Rey is perfectly capable of sitting up to collect it, but the youth is hoping to milk his “superficial injuries” for all they’re worth. At least get out of a week of horrific trust exercises.
Clearly aware of Rey’s ploy and not amused, Sainovic stomps over and snatches up the fruit.
After a beat, Sainovic tosses the apple up in the air, El Rey instinctively moves, leaning forward on the couch to catch it. The moment the apple is in El Rey’s fist, Zoran stabs into it with a butterfly knife. El Rey is too shocked to even drop it.
Zoran: Faster in, overcompensating for resistance from whatever organ you’re cutting into. Be aware of how deep you’re going. At a certain point, each millimetre becomes a cost benefit analyzes, how much more damage are you doing, versus how much harder its going to be to get out. Keep it straight, and if you aren’t planning on a further flourish, zere is no reason not end with a twist.
El Rey stifles a yelp, as Sainovic removes the apple – the blade stopping just short of piercing right through into the youth's hand.
Zoran (twisting the knife in a way that splits the apple into slices, which he hands to his trembling ward): Now if zis was Cooldown’s kidney, we’d see just how tight zey were with Tuna.
Pale as a ghost, El Rey inspects his hand to make sure it’s still in one piece. Rey doesn’t really have an appetite, but Sainovic seems expectant, so he forces the apple down.
Zoran: Ze good news is, if you can shake off zat suicide attempt-
Rey: You told me to jump!
Zoran: ...Zen you are able to absorb impressive degrees of punishment. Zis plays to a certain tag team strength.
Rey: It does?
Zoran: Exactly, we’re going to school ze Jamrockers with a little RNR treatment.
Rey: I love it! What does that mean?
Zoran: Classic tag formula. You play Ricky Morton, letting Jam pass you around like you were a prison leisure centre, zen when zey’re starting to get tired pummelling you into hamburger, HOT TAG, I pull a Gibson, coming in with a few well placed blades for ze win.
Rey: Why do I have to be Morton? Why can’t you be Morton?
Zoran: Zat wouldn’t be very believable.
Rey: That’s not fair! I want a chance to be Mel Gibson too. I’ll fight you for it!
Sainovic forces a faint smile. It’s terrifying. The deep bruising makes it hard for El Rey to throw his hands over his mouth aghast at his suggestion. This is bad. He needs to think on his feet, but they’re resting on the couch!
Rey: ...............At Rock Paper Scissors.
Good save.
Zoran: Fine. If you really zink you can... Mel Gibson... who am I to dash your dream?
The two men bring their arms down three times, before the final reveal-
Zoran busts out scissors...
Which El Rey smashes with his rock.
Rey: So how does it work? You stumble into a tag, and I go on a drunken anti-Semitic rant?
Zoran: Best two out of zree.
Scissors are again smashed by rock.
Zoran: Zree out of five-
Rock just keeps breaking scissors; the humiliating montage finally ends with...
Zoran: It makes no sense... I could break a rock with scissors.
Rey: You could, but the rest of the world gets SMASHED.
Zoran: Zis game is silly. Perhaps we should switch to...
A dissolve takes us into the dead of night, where the hotel room is now trashed with a various board games. A coffee table between an increasingly cocky El Rey, and an unhinged looking Final Boss, hosts a chessboard. A student of the game, Sainovic is clearly going for a Najdorf Variation of the Sicilian Defence, when El Rey decides to use his knight to hop six pieces.
Rey: KING ME!
Zoran: Zat’s checkers.
Rey: Oh, I’ll just leave it there then.
Checkmate.
Zoran: ...How do you feel about Rummy?
Rey: Bring it on, Ricky!
And so the evening continues, with El Rey’s winning ways encouraging celebratory dances that might be counter productive to his health. It appears that the best-laid plans of the Final Boss have blown up in his face, and that humiliating defeat at the hands of the Jamrockers is inevitable. At least Jason Long will be happy. Still, when it comes to Zoran Sainovic, one has to wonder if this is part of a more sinister scheme. As El Rey busts out a deck of cards, the camera pans around the hotel room to the television set where Seventh Seal is playing. Here another fool plays games of chance against the Grim Reaper with life itself at stake...